It's not my first time setting foot in Ipoh, but the novelty never wears off as if my every visit to this place was the very first. The food that revives my taste bud, the stalagmites and the stalactites that reintroduce the beauty of the Mother nature, how could I ever get bored of this place?
Ah, I'm so going to miss the white coffee!
Sunday, August 12
Another night waking up in the middle of the night with my heart pace doubled. Frustrated by the fact that all the attempts getting back to sleep are to no avail, I hauled myself out of my bed and sit by the window, staring blankly into the darkness, hoping the serenity of the night could perhaps turn into serendipity.
From the corner of my eyes, I could see my own reflection on the window, sitting calmly with my chin resting effortlessly on the back of my hand, akin to the Thinker. Oh the Great Thinker, what was it that put you into such deep thought? Were you too pondering the one word so widely known but only few grasp the true meaning of it? Love, what is it all about? Some say love is like a rubix cube, there are countless numbers of wrong twists and turns, but when you get it right, it looks perfect no matter what way you look at it. So the question is, what is the combination of perfection? I know not, but the best quote that has caught my attention is this:
"Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Loves is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in others people's sins, but delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes." ----- Nicholas Sparks, A Walk To Remember
My reflection on the window gradually lost its form, replaced by the wisp of memories reeled back in time, replaying themselves in front of me...
how we spent hours and hours making the yet-to-be-completed papier-mâché photoframe for your sister's wedding, how you cheered me up when I screwed up the wedding medley on your sister's wedding ceremony, how our hands sweat for the first time we hold each other's hand, how you cried on our first valentine's, the embarrassing moment when I accidentally called your dad "dad", how I always failed to surprise you, how you jokingly whacked me when I first gave you the invisible letter and how you fell into the same trick again the second time, how you were mad at me for telling white lies and made me a completely real person as I'm now, how you took away my worries and sorrow when I was down, the extra milo powder in your milo ice, how I pecked on your cheek in cinema unannounced, the cake that you baked for our 8 months, how you ate 4 and a quarter of mochi in one shot and the happiness shined all over your face, how we sacrificed sleeping time to skype when you're in New Zealand, how we communicated through emails, how I piggybacked you around, shout our lungs out while we're playing watersport in Penang, decorating mashmallows for Min Min's first birthday, how you crave for fatty crab or tian xiang, how I tucked you in bed everytime you're sick, how we talked about the future happily, how you tried to teach me dance but the poorly coordinated torso brings nothing but laughter, the wonderful night you donned in cyan maxi dress and the candle light dinner prepared all by yourself, the share of excitement when you won the championship of your very first ball room dance competition, the beef steak that turned out quite mediocre and the cream puff that doesn't puff...
What has brought these two totally unconnected persons together? And what was it then that has contributed to the current situation? Was it muscle memory that urged you to cling to my arm or was the hidden desire of yours? Is true love just once in a lifetime? If you could walk your life once more, how differently would you choose your path this time? If there's a still chance to turn things around, would you let it slipped through your fingers or hold it as tight as you could and never let it go again? And if I ask you to dance, would you dance with me?
I struggled tremendously deciding if I should publish this post or should I just keep it as a draft. As much as you want to avoid inflicting any further pain on me, I too hope that you could walk away easier. But that's the thing about seeing the pearl that you once hold so dear but now it's not being treated as good as it used to be. Since I've promised you I won't hold back even knowing that you would read this, I'll just go by my words, hope this will not become the reason that jeopardise the friendship we have now. I'll remain silent but he better holds you tight and gives you all his love...
Mike, a vacation trainee seconded from Chicago whom I worked with few weeks back. Such sincerity and friendliness! Thanks Mike, you're always welcome to visit Malaysia, and next time, I'll make sure I fulfil my obligation as a host. And this is what my manager told me after spending weeks of sleepless night plodding through a mountain of work.
What a stark contrast! Perhaps the latter one has magnified the appreciation I felt when I read Mike's email. Not only he denied our hardwork, he even trying to take credits at our expense. I wonder who was the one requesting us to combine all worksheets in one excel file but convert each tab into PDF for submission despite how we told you it's redundant and inefficient; who was the one keeping quiet when the client has not provided us all the information as agreed but refused to revise the timeline; where were you when the client was making a huge fuss out of nothing; who was the one knowing nothing after reviewing the file and asked my newly joined junior to clear queries with partner? And since when were you working late? I've seen you missing-in-action more than anything else. Despite all your incompetency and inconsideration, I've still did what you've asked in respect of your position, but it does not mean that I respect you as a person.
If this happened to me last year, I might just keep quiet and take it with a sigh, but not now. Obviously, I'd not succumb to this Hobson's choice and I'll fight for what is rightfully mine, meaning both my OT and my performance!
As the soft ray of the golden evening sun oozed across the reddish sky, I couldn't help but to stand underneath for a good five minutes with my eyes closed, allowing the evening heat to permeate through my skin and ignite my bones. For months I've been working relentlessly through the wee hours, comatose from lack of sleep, barely sustaining on will and caffeine. As the heat slowly wraps itself all over my body, I could feel a gust of energy bursting insideout, associated with a flood of relief. Finally, all burdens are shook off and I'm home for dinner. Ah, pretty pretty sunset, how I've missed you so!
